Category: Mental Health - Mala Naidoo's Book World

Creativity and Grief

Creativity feeds off emotions both positive and negative. Words give vent to the language of the heart.

Grief after the passing of a deeply loved one, sucks the wind from the sails of creativity, for a while… Fighting it is futile, emotions are in a tangle when death is unexpectedly sudden.

Fit one day, gone the next. The mind is thrown into chaos as exhaustion sets in, slowing down the clock to a sonorous ticking of every minute, every hour.

Be gentle with yourself when grief momentarily steals the creative edge.

Isolation and solitude are necessary to process the deeply felt loss. Within there is the need to comfort the nearest and dearest around one going through the same process.

But in those still, grieving, reflective moments, hours, days, and many weeks, creativity takes on a new face — creative expression on loss and grief. Picking up a pen and journal offers the promise of comfort when there is no inclination to turn on the laptop. Poetry emerges in the healing as words tumble out in emotional self-expression, mourning the deep-seated loss.

Words comfort and clear the brambles of the heart.

Seeking solace in meditation while grieving might, at times, seem impossible when the conscious mind buckles, contorts in pain. The way out is through writing, giving vent to grief and anger and all the unanswered whys…

Memory beckons, draws one in to seek solace in understanding the heart’s tears.

Soon, day by day, time allows the soul to accept, to find a new way, to adapt, to be, by letting go of the familiar patterns of one’s life. As humans we are adaptable to change, if one allows the mind to remain healthy by turning to warm memories, and articulating emotions — pain eases, and limits sinking into the dark depths of despair.

Grief is the single most difficult challenge of life (as I see it) in coming to terms with the gentle, deep cadence of a voice one will never hear again, a face never seen again in the flesh – the Guiding Light of one’s angst no longer there to soothe troubles or share joy.

Time is a long-standing ally to a grieving soul.

Acceptance is not an easy path to tread when the void is palpable…huge… but healing will come with time as memories resurface in those moments when a birthday card or photograph falls out a book, or pops up on a phone or Facebook Memories to remind one of the love shared. Loss is never overcome, but heart-warming moments return when least expected in unexpected places, to catch a breath in quiet recall to ignite a smile.

Creativity hooks emotions — grief the impasse as the eye turns inward to gather new creative pace and space.

If you have lost a loved one, take heart, your muse never flees in the hours of need, but draws renewed vigour from your newest angel, ready to guide your creative light.

a month too soon

let him rise in peace

as he lived his life

sharing love and joy with those

who honoured his stature

a compassionate giving soul

taken gently in the early morn

rising swiftly into the arms of Divine Grace

(RIP Beloved Father of Mine)

I hope you find comfort and reassurance that grief borne needs time, so be gentle with your creative self by keeping the mind healthy to protect your heart for the wondrous, comforting glow of memory and renewed imagination…

Stay safe.

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Creative Self-Care

A creative life brings much joy and excitement where it’s easy to forget that it is work. And as with all work, the mind and body tire when passion pushes on in a hedonistic surge, and more so when creating new worlds peopled with exciting characters doing extraordinary things or making the ordinary quite exciting.

Putting the foot on the brake when exhaustion sets in does not send the creative muse into permanent banishment—quite the opposite. A brief pause, a day or perhaps two, refuels the creative well with the elixir needed to push to the next level of creative intentions. It is only the physical act of doing that is on a temporary hiatus to clear the mind to absorb new inspiration, the sights, sounds, movements, to see the everyday and old with refreshed eyes.

The pause could be time spent to catch up on much needed relaxed reading, beach walks, feeling the outdoors, meandering in a museum, taking in a movie, going to the theatre, or out to breakfast or dinner with yourself. Me time invigorates the creative mind and spirit. Although most creatives work in solitude and might crave company, it is elected carefree time alone, whether in a crowd or on a private beach, that eases mental exhaustion generated by passionate overwork.

It is the creative’s passion that invests extensive time, and intense hard work to produce a work of art, be it a manuscript, painting, a sculpture, or music. The ultimate piece, the artwork outside the physical form has its own story to tell as one of sheer commitment for the love and euphoria generated by creating—early mornings before the world wakes, late nights, and oftentimes all night, fobbing off distractions and knowing when to say no to external demands irrespective of who makes the demand.

Only the creative knows what matters most.

Allow the self to enjoy one’s own company away from the work to fine tune the energy and inner wellness of the mind and body without the noise of mental chatter. The creative soul needs that one-on-one with the self. Decide if this one-on-one with the self should be a weekly, fortnightly or monthly date. Go out for coffee with yourself. Take a walk on the beach alone. Human gregariousness is always there to pick up when the time is right.

Work and life…life and work are indistinguishable for the dedicated creative

Have you ever set a date with yourself? Go to your favourite place once a week, alone, for a month and journal your thoughts and feelings. Something that might surprise you is that you will return after each date teeming with ideas for a new project. Time out is beneficial for productivity—the energy and freshness ignite thinking outside the four walls of a writing/creative/workplace space.

Fill the creative well with some time out.

Never be afraid, or think it selfish to enjoy your own company—you are your own best friend, number one in your tribe.

Just as we free-write in our journals every day, that private time with intimate words on a page—quite a different energy to drafting a manuscript—in the same vein, getting out of a regular creative space be it in an office at home, or elsewhere, is a self-made retreat for the creative spirit. Going AWOL for a day is liberating for creative energy, for all energy! Try it!

Make a date with number one. Enjoy your own company and return blessed and refreshed.

Happy Creative Rest!

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Erase Negative Generators

Some quick pointers as we either drown in or swim out of the quagmire of negative news.

As fiction writers we are wired to all that happens around us as our receptors absorb ideas for the next great story. The blessing and curse of the news – more a curse in the current times while essential for updates on matters of health and mortality, the economic slump and the general state of the nation – it is disruptive in its overdose of negativity.

Brain receptors

The writer’s receptors grab ideas at the speed of a 5G network – the mind is never at rest, dreams emerge during troubled times as stress levels are elevated and the quest for ideas, for the next great book, arrives in a mangled mind needing time out. Once this agglomerates to confuse and clog thinking which we are at risk of in the current global climate, the danger is depressing outcomes for the writer on high alert – never wanting to miss a moment of the rapid global change we are undergoing. The virulent effect, if we are not selective, leaves its scar for a lifetime.

Be Selective

Choice matters when words count and writing deadlines are set-up. Where possible avoid mismanaged choices that deaden your writing plans – dry the inkwell or moves the virus into your hard drive. Choose to read inspirational material to reframe how you see yourself in the world. I recommend reading The Untethered Soul, the journey beyond yourself, by Michael Singer to redirect thoughts to positivity and peace.

To attain true inner freedom, you must be able to objectively watch your problems instead of being lost in them – Michael Singer, The Untethered Soul

Erase Negative News for Creativity to Shine

Poetry, meditation, or inspirational music will reset your inner dial for greater productivity. Catch up on writing podcasts to refresh your muse. There are loads of positive platforms to draw from to rev your creative mojo free from negativity.

Go Creative Flow Practice

Music is the Food of Life, Please Play on

Whatever your choice of music choose healing sounds to quieten the mind and open the creative receptors free of the pollution of an overload of negative news.

Kimba Arem

Louis Armstong

Mandala 7 Chakras

Dance/Move your way to writing inspiration

Dance like nobody is watching is an excellent way to get the blood pumping and the mood in an upswing, so whatever you choose to do, jive, toe-tap or nod to the rhythm of the sounds, you will feel energised to activate what might be momentarily blocked.

Jerusalema

Happy Song

Try a little Humour

Watch old comedy movies/television sitcoms or stand-up comedy shows. Slapstick humour relaxes the body and mind and transports us to joy – a positive mental state necessary for general wellbeing and a surge in creative energy.

Fawlty Towers
Are you being served?
‘Allo ‘Allo

Select what you will read, listen, dance or move to in your week and notice how your writing flows when you mindfully infuse beauty and peace into your daily activities.

Stay safe, find peace, abundant writing best wishes sent your way!

Happy Reading. Happy Writing!

Share your ideas on how to uplift positivity in our writing lives and life in general.

Writing Through Adversity

Writing has been well documented as having therapeutic value. Do you keep a personal diary, or a journal to record moments that are significant to you? Would you write a memoir or autobiography? Have you tried poetry writing?

Fiction is an avenue that has therapeutic benefit when writing about angst through fiction or poetry. This has value in reaching readers who might face a similar situation. Receiving a reader’s comment on connecting with a character or situation makes writing move from the realm of fictional entertainment to enhancing life, creating a sense of belonging through the power of story/words that whisper, ‘there are people who go through this, you are not alone, it’s not you…’

Human difficulties like our joys are universal and part of our shared humanity regardless of demography or any divisive label. We learn from each other, we share with each other — altruism is part of our human ‘feel good’ makeup. We feel good or secure in knowing that challenges are not unique. This is where fiction like a memoir/autobiography/biography and poetry has the ability to say, ‘I see you, I hear you, I feel your situation.’

‘In our angst and joy we are one under the sky of humanity’

Oftentimes something heard, something seen, or read triggers the imagination to create a story/poem — these seeds have their origin in human experience. Everything in life has imaginative storytelling potential. Historical fiction is a genre whereby much from history or literature is reimagined to suit a particular context adding timelessness to a story.

Poems and stories, when turned inward, create… growth… healing… self-awareness

Shakespeare’s The Tempest reimagined by Margaret Atwood in her novel, Hag-Seed is an example. Prospero becomes Felix a theatre director in a present-day context — he is grieving the deaths of his wife and daughter and has been backstabbed by an aspirational colleague. His vulnerability is an evocative point of connection with the reader. Professional or workplace strife present timeless human dilemmas, but when tastefully explored as a novel’s premise or ideas, it has the potential to speak to many isolated, lonely individuals — there is no shame in being vulnerable. Shame sits on the shoulders of those who abuse vulnerability. The most endearing people, in reality, are those who have experienced hardship, financially, in grief or loss, abuse or ill-health — having walked in the shoes of many with struggles, wires empathy — as human experience should be if we hope to coexist in peace and harmony.

Fiction can remind us why it is essential to be true to who we are in our expressions of self and in our interactions with each other.

In Souls of Her Daughters, Dr Grace Sharvin who heads a busy medical ER has unimaginable frailties but her strength is in her capacity to reach out to others while fighting her own demons.

Life’s lessons come from the adversarial people met, and they become the basis upon which writers craft their villains. A little bit of this and a little bit of that blended in a cauldron and hey presto! The (im)perfect villain is born! The good people we meet shape perspectives on why adversarial individuals have no place in a shared world.

Timeless heart-warming and gut-wrenching stories on life’s challenges and celebrations.

Literature is a luxury, Fiction is a necessity — GK Chesterton

and

Albert Camus said, Fiction is the lie through which we tell the truth.

Who can argue with such pearls of truth now?

Life, literature, news of the day, and history portray human experiences that provide inroads to new fictional stories and evocative poetry that connect rather than divide by exposing, celebrating, loving, grieving and understanding what it really means to be human. We all, whether real or fictional are indeed not alone in adversity.

Which novels and poems would you recommend to readers on overcoming adversity? Have you read A Spark of Hope?

The Valentine in YOU!

The creative well is endless if you’re in it for the long haul. Writing eBooks, print books, creating audio books, working with editors, cover designers, and marketing your books – no publisher will do the marketing for you! An abundance of creative energy soon leads to mental exhaustion a type of brain drain that can potentially dry the creative well. Act on helping your creative self to sustain energy and wellness for the long haul.

Love and care for YOUR creative self keeps the muse in your orbit.

Some Tips for Love and Self-Care for YOUR Creative Self

To keep the creative juice flowing you must show the artist in you, some love.

How do we do this?
Replenish the source of your well by carving space in YOUR day:

• Meditate in your day preferably in the morning before you begin writing for perhaps half an hour, or in shorter bursts throughout the day

• Listen to soothing calming, theta sounds when you take a break between planning or writing scenes

• Take a walk outdoors – if you can take a walk on the beach, or in a park, this will be great to listen to the sounds of nature with the double benefit of rest and awakening the senses

• Sing no matter how out of you might be or strum a guitar if you have one around – the therapeutic value is giving yourself some love

You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching… ~ William W Purkey

• Read something inspirational before you sleep – a poem or a prayer

• Write when your energy is at an optimum level, if it’s the morning for you, then market your brand/books in the afternoon

• Talk to an optimistic person, perhaps one who loves your work, then reach out – positive energy ignites creativity

These are but a few ways to keep that well pumping out the creative energy that brings your fabulous work of art into the world. Begin with one thing at a time to ease exhaustion – creativity is fresh, passionate, and lively, so be sure to get in enough zzz’s. The number of hours will depend on your personal make-up, work-day etc. Anything less than 6 hours is risking exhaustion during your creative hours.

Beautiful sounds feed LOVE FOR THE CREATIVE YOU:

Theta Sounds

I hope you have an amazing Valentine’s Day!

Happy Writing, Happy Creative Love!

Please share your thoughts in the box below.

Truth Reloaded

In telling stories, writers draw from values they either ascribe to or find abhorrent.

Are stories purely to entertain or do they serve a purpose beyond plot and characters? Grand narratives are timeless because they showcase society in all its grandeur and dismal failings.

Living today, in what is so much a constructed, fake, flawed world – fair enough perfection does not exist and my own take is perfection in imperfection, we should continue to be passionate about truth – in the books we read, the news we hear and spread. We want to read the sequel or the next book in a series because we want to know more, the truth, the outcomes…

Whether it is the writer’s intention or not, the truth is at the core of the narratives we read. In a previous post, I included thoughts on why we crave the truth.

The need to know is as necessary as the air we breathe, ignorance is bliss is a temporary state of bliss, soon, regardless the loss incurred, the truth will be pursued. The female protagonists in my novels hunt down the truth or live, at first, in a temporary state of ignorant bliss, but soon the gnawing urge to know the truth seeps in, in whatever shape or form it might appear.

For what it’s worth

One cannot be true to what one believes or to who one truly is, if being part of the zeitgeist is prioritised in life – is risking the joys of an authentic life, being comfortable in your own skin, worth the group affiliation? Narcissism guides the exclusivity individuals create while drowning a sense of what is just. A shared humanity is crushed, elitism (as in vanity, not the cha-ching) separates and invites unjust notions of difference. Prizing individuality over falling in with the clique can lead to social isolation, so is it the choice of the brave-hearted alone? – this shapes the thinking reflected in art and literature – the higher purpose in storytelling.

Perfection in Imperfection

Now back to ‘shades of truth’

The energy and time taken to justify an untruth can be used (truth be told) to benefit the lives of all around us.

Politicians and the media are often starved of a good dose of the antidote to the truth to face up to and fess up to the agendas they serve (often aligned to those who hold perceived power) and the mistruths they engender. Truth is valued over empty promises, no matter how deeply buried and ignored, it drips back wreaking havoc which could have been prevented early on, with the plain old truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth saving the day.

Oprah Winfrey’s inspirational Commencement Speech at USC, 2018 sends a message to new graduates, (and the world at large) upcoming journalists, to accept truth as we see it, hear it and so should we report it. But is it as easy as that? What halts truth? Fear? Popularity?

Truth often pays a hefty price when the lid is lifted, it incurs cynicism and attack in the need to sweep its halo under a rug.

No matter how difficult or painful in the moment of revelation, owning up to the truth, perpetuating the truth ultimately leads to a stress-free glorious life, bringing a peaceful night’s sleep with it. Good mental health rests on truth, understanding, and compassion.

Go speak your truth, be who you truly are, nobody defines you, forget being cliquish, it destroys relationships and is often perpetuated by an egotistical leader. Meryl, Marcia, Grace, and Patience, strong fictional women in my novels, Across Time and Space, the sequel Vindication Across Time and Souls of Her Daughters with a forthcoming saga, face the truth with dignity, speak their minds and try to make the world a better place. They are flawed characters, but truth helps them grow and at times trip up. In their fictional worlds, they make art mirror life.

What’s your take on speaking your truth, standing alone, avoiding the pseudo-elitism of cliques, how will you live with truth, understanding, and compassion? We all need a good night’s sleep, right?

Be a truth seeker, tell your story, set the record straight.

Fear Is Thy Strength

After an evening at the amazing Headlong, Nottingham and Almeida Theatre production of 1984, the timeless warning of the danger of unchecked power and the futility of resistance invited thoughts about the state of society in other areas of power, control and fear.

The passive aggressive comment, the staring down to intimidate, the proclamations of intellectual superiority, cultural, religious or racial bias uttered from a monocultural, bigoted point of view instils fear in the targeted individual which reverberates with the mental torture, Orwell’s, Winston Smith undergoes.

Sleepless nights, dreaded days, endless bouts of nausea, skulking in the shadows away from penetrating eyes, questions about questions.

The long day’s journey into another sleepless night becomes relentless. Guilt, self-questioning and a whittling away of self-confidence reeks of the fascism of workplace politics.

Competitiveness of the narcissistic ladder climbing co-worker or the sadistic joy in pulling others down is yet another corrosive dimension of inhumanity.

Systemic torment dims the light of the once vibrant, optimistic individual, the light is interrupted as dark days take over. Winston Smith tried to hang onto the waning light in Nineteen Eighty-Four.

With every knock…

The eroded self-confidence and panic attacks sends the tormented individual hurtling into a bottomless pit of mental anguish …

Each act of power and control, topples the victim blow-by-blow…

BUT

While the message is bleak, while it might not seem possible, there is a light at the end of the long, dark tunnel, the light of strength.

Fear is thy strength when compassion and love grow from the depths of pain.
In fear, there resides hope.

Hope is the light

A video excerpt from the film Nineteen Eighty-Four :

The flickering light gets brighter as the individual rises from darkness, looking upwards towards the sun, guided by an unseen hand.

George Orwell predicted a future that has become a reality today, not only within the realm of politics and governance but also as a cautionary note to take a closer look in the mirror to decide if our souls are indeed supportive or destructive of each other.

A dark message sheds light on what should be rectified to save ourselves and the ‘unborn’, the next generation, from even darker inhumane acts.

Down with the Big Brothers and Sisters that attempt to intimidate while asserting their own self-obsessed grandeur!

What will you do today to uplift someone from the quagmire of human cruelty?